I've let a few gigs slide in terms of posting the account in this blog. The Goldstar rehearsals and then the Gig and the last Freedom gig have gone by the wayside through a lack of time but also now that the swing of the Route 66 tour has ended, so has the swing that was my motivation to write a blog about it. A big apology to any of you that check every day with baited breath in anticipation of the next installment. I have failed you, I know it and I'm sorry!
Man, how self righteous am I?
I had 12 days to kill as a Freddy and the Mercury's gig was cancelled. Faced with 12 days of nothing, what was likely to happen is a lot of twiddling my thumbs, wanking, making a fucking nusance of myself to my folks, going to my sisters house while she was out, tormenting their dog by given her Toffee, knocking on people's doors and running away before they answered, calling a Pizza house and asking for "Amanda Hugankiss" etc etc I realised all in all that I should get away. Qatar airways had an excellent promo for Ramadan so I decided to take the plunge and head back east... Middle east that is!
The flight over was scheduled from Gatwick for the morning after a Freddy And The Mercurys gig in Diss, near Great Yarmouth (there's fuck all Great about it I have to say!) So with logistics the way it was, I had to stop at Stansted Airport on the way back from the gig around 02:00, getting a bus to Gatwick from there at 04:30 arrving at Gatwick at 06:30 flying at 10:15 having had NO sleep. Well, not true exactly, I slept at a pub (and almost missed the flight) in departures as it had a lovely leather sofa and no one to do my head in! You know the sort, OLD PEOPLE faffing about wondering if they packed enough Preparation H for their trip or fucking kids crying for whatever reason they see fit. Seriously, if the Government wants to limit the number of Teenage Pregnancies just play the sound of a screaming child to these Chavs whilst in the midst of passion (if you can call it that) and I guarantee their erection will deflate quicker than a balloon being blown-up by a piss-head!
The flight over to Doha was fine or as fine as flying can be, call me old fashioned if you will but I still hate being in a piece of Aluminium (Aluminum to my American friends) at 35,000 ft travelling at 500 mph!
But I will say that if you are the sort that choses who you fly with, I totally recommend Qatar Airways. The only thing I would say that was missing was a complimentary gobble off one of the Trolly Dollies! Failing that, they are excellent. When I booked the ticket online it asked "food preference" and I ticked something and thought no more of it. One hour in to the flight, out comes the nosh and sure enough a tray with MY NAME ON IT comes and it was exactly what I asked for! AWESOME!
They aren't shy in handing out the piss too, I need about 5 wines before I can chill out and sure enough they dished out without issue. None of the "tutting" and "huffing" like you'd get on BA flights! They did have one stipulation, that I drink out out of a glass without the small bottle being present. This is because it was Ramadan and something about Alcohol and religious blah blah etc I said, "If you keep them coming, I'll drink them out of my arse crack!" .... they didn't see the funny side.
I watched Harry Potter and the Philosopher Stone, the first movie and I really enjoyed it! I plan to claw through the series so that I can finally go to the cinema to watch whatever is the latest one.
I will say that no matter how much they say to turn off all electrical appliances especially mobile phone on these flights to the middle east, there's always one cunt that thinks that the text message conversation he's having with some bitch (because it would have to be that wouldn't it?) is more important than interfering with the Avionics! Again (as it's happened a few times before) I had to politely mention "Oi!! Turn off the phone for fuck sake is it??!!!"
At Abu Dhabi (after a quick stop at Doha) I got fleeced by an Indian Taxi driver, what a way to start! He said "80dhms to City" when it should have been no more than 50dhms and he only gave me 10 change of a 100! Oh, well after 5 years living there I should have been used to it. But I was tired and didn't want to start my holiday with a row with some Indian fucker on a crusade to fleece whitey, blacky or anyone of any colour, religion and creed!
More on what happened next...
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