Freddy with some Mercury part 4

The second day here started much like the first; everyone waking up groggy sporting a slight hangover (Phil) due to the heat. Me, not so much so. I mean, it was hot but for fuck sake, stop whining about it you little bitches! We could still be in the UK! (which typically was having pretty good weather in our absence)

We headed off to the bar to shove another one of John's awesome breakfasts down our gullets. After chatting to him about his background, I was to discover that he used to run an independent Supermarket in Essex for over 25 years. I asked what made him sell up and move to Spain thinking it would have been Tesco's, Asda or another major name moving down the road. Alas it wasn't, "Retirement" he said was the reason. How cynical have I become eh?

The bar itself was something he started to relieve the boredom. His original plan was to have a quiet little Tavern to keep his hand in as it were. But never did he expect it to become so successful. He quite casually offered me to buy it off him, "It will be the best quarter of a Million you'll ever spend!" Hmmm, now where did I put my wallet?

After breakfast, we headed into the town and picked up some groceries. Ian picked up some baccy. I bought a Melon, it seemed like a decent idea at the time.

During the trip, Darren was looking in a shop for some shorts as he planned to lounge by the pool all afternoon with Phil and Gary. There was a Chinese owned/ran shop where they sold everything from socks to guns. Well, not really but it was like one of them pound shops where there's seemingly no catagorisation to the displays so you'd see powertools next to tinned foods etc. I asked the woman, "Perdone, ¿usted habla Inglés?" (excuse me, do you speak English?"

"No!" She replied. So thinking hard, I asked her,

"Bien, ¿dónde puedo encontrar el mayor pantalones cortos?" (Where can I find the largest shorts?"

Thinking my Spanish was still pretty good and feeling quite the international traveller she replied with,

"Yo no hablo Inglés!" (I don't speak English)

With my ego somewhat dented, I repeated what I said a lot slower and she seemed to get it this time. Which was a good thing because one more time and I would have been saying, "WHERE'S THE FACKIN' SHORTS!" She explained that they don't have any in his size (pointing to Darren)

So we headed back to the Villa. Phil and Gary went to the pool, I chose to go for a run feeling a little guilty at not doing any exercise and eating like Billy Bunter these last couple of days.

- Billy Bunter (strangely enough looks a little like Darren our bassist!)

The run was ok, I basically set the timer for 30 minutes and ran around the blocks of Villas 3 times before the alarm sounded. It was rather tranquil for the most part but coming up to the 30 minute mark, my legs and feet were really starting to hurt. Running the roads is a far cry from the cushy treadmills of gymnasiums I can tell thee! Still I felt much better for it, even if I didn't look so as the boys pointed out upon my panting return.

The 20 minutes by the pool was sufficient enough to turn Phil into a burning Lobster, he was quite in pain! That's why I never do the sunbathing thing, even though I normally don't burn and go brown (much to the envy of any female company) I stay away from it. The health reasons are so scary; regular sunbathing increases the risk of skin cancer by 75% so none of us should ever go out with at least a wet suit and a welder's helmet. So given these health reasons, I prefer to stay in the shade and smoke cigarettes safe in the knowledge I have my health at heart.

The second gig was musically a lot better. There were more people there for starters so I thought we was going to have a bouncing gig, but they took quite a while to get into it. Gary did his Freddy bit which worked a treat even though it did seem to take a while longer than the previous night to take effect. Ian was doing his Twister thing with the keyboards, Phil and Darren both played well. On the whole, it was a lot better than the previous night. The bows at the end were strange, I always think that when people do that (unless they are really huge like U2 or Bros) they are showing oodles of showbiz wank.

- Naked beach twister, sort of like Ian playing keyboards with one on a stand and another to his right on a coffee-style table... sort of.

After the gig, we drank loads again, hung about with the staff (some of which were really hot) and generally thanked John for the risk in bringing us over. He'd made a few quid on the couple of days and we chatted about how we could save them money next time. As we had to be up for 5 am to get to the airport, we didn't hang around too long.

At the villa, we sat around on the veranda, ate Pineapple, drank coffee and smoked Cigarettes. I was sad to be leaving in a few hours. The last few days went so quickly but have certainly become the highlight of my year. It will take a lot of topping to beat it and judging from the gig sheet I have coming up, nothing is likely to compare.